Several months ago I signed up with Influenster after seeing my sister post an Instagram of a particularly lovely shade of lipstick she got from them. Or was it sunscreen? I forget. Anyway. I didn’t really expect it to light my world ablaze necessarily, but I figured I’d give it a shot and see what I got before giving up on it like I do for many things my sister does, such as couponing, cooking, and advanced trigonometry.
So. I received my first “VoxBox”, and considered it with a very suspicious eye. Primarily because it asks you to broadcast your opinion via every social channel known to man. I’m not a fan of spam. Neither is the rest of the world. So I figured right then and there that keeping my feedback limited to a few items and severely non-annoying frequency would be key.
That first box actually had some good samples. Mascara, after-sun lotion, coupons and nail polish that I didn’t realize was A) not quick drying and B) not for children until after I’d decorated one of my three year olds’ with it and she fell completely in love with the color. Because, of course.
I was honestly thinking of deleting my account. It requires a lot of time and promotion and I figured, ‘meh. It’s just samples’.
Which is exactly when the next VoxBox showed up. With a Braun Thermoscan 5 inside. Then I was REALLY thinking this wasn’t worth it, because I have been using the same temporal thermometer my Mom, Queen Labor & Delivery Nurse of the Universe, gave us for our baby shower three years ago, AND I LOVE IT. Even though I have to use it four times per head because I can’t ever get the angle right and figure it couldn’t hurt to find an average.
That Thermoscan immediately found a home under my desk, where I intentionally ignored it. NO, MR. BRAUN MCTHERMY-THING, WE ARE HAVING NONE OF YOUR INNER EAR BLEEPY BUSINESS HERE. I BANISH THEE.
A week later, Emma got a cold. Right after we’d visited a friend with compromised immunity. Whom we’d waited months to see for This. Exact. Reason. Thankfully, we’d washed our hands about five times in three hours and did not come in close contact with her. She did not so much as develop a sniffle.
However. Things at our house were a little different.
Here’s how a cold cycle works through our house: Emma gets a runny nose. Develops a junky throat two hours after bedtime, wakes up crying like a baby seal and gets a crap night of sleep. She wakes up a little better. Everyone else seems fine. Two days in, she’s still sick. On the third morning, Sarah wakes up sick but would rather play. Emma gets a fever. Ashley develops the teeniest of runny noses, but also can’t be bothered with details like colds. By the fourth morning, we have varying degrees of ZOMBIE DEATH and oh, hey Mom, we got you something, too.
FORTY WEEKS LATER EVERYONE RECOVERS.
This scenario was going through my head on Night 1, and I thought, as one does, “I should take her temperature.” But my regular thermometer was nowhere to be found. Probably because our girls are REALLY INTO FLASHLIGHTS RIGHT NOW, and I can’t find those, either.
So I did what any reasonable person in my shoes would do. I put my hand on her forehead. Not being ridiculously hot, I put her to bed and proceeded to look for the thermometer. Which is still MIA.
I finally broke out the Braun Thermoscan 5 out on Day 3 or 4, when she DID finally start feeling hot. This is what I got. From all three kids.
World’s Best Mom, you guys.
Also? The new thermometer rocks. I was very anti-one-use-disposable caps as it was CLEARLY a ploy to sell me more crap, but then I realized, I probably can’t clean a digital tip with alcohol. It’s actually very handy, very quick and very compact. Everything stores in on snappy little container, and as long as I put it on top of the bookshelf, I’ll probably be able to find it whenever I need.