You guys, I feel so weird right now.
My priorities might be just a bit screwed up because the first thing I worried about when walking into the free weight room tonight was how loud my ringer was, because if by crazy chance someone called me at 9 o’clock at night, the entire gym would be listening to the sound of the Goblin King rocking out to Dance Magic Dance.
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The second thing I worried about was the fact that the exercise plan the trainer I meet with last week made for me during our “hi welcome to the gym this is your free evaluation so what are your goals I’ll make you sweat like you haven’t in the past five years with this basic core free weight routine and wouldn’t you feel more secure hiring me for just a few more sessions?” was nowhere to be found.
I remembered the machines, I think. Most of the exercises, too. Well. The gist of them, anyway.
My neck didn’t quite feel right during those standing push-ups. But they were still hella better than the turtle death-scene that is my attempt at floor push-ups. I did planks and pull across and the low row. I tried lateral presses and hinges, and I did at least twice many as before. But I never broke a sweat.
And I’m pretty sure that’s not right. I mean, I’m new, but I’m not NEW. Between the ages of 4 – 24, I spent several hours a week in a dance class of some kind. The talent I dreamed of never came, but I put in the sweat. I taped the raw toes. I pushed to the edge of pain.
And I didn’t find it tonight. Instead, I found rubbery arms and legs, with zero ache in any of the places I wanted to work.
45 minutes later, I ended up back in the ‘selectable machines’ or whatever they call the ones the trainers hate, just to feel some amount of strain.
I think I just don’t have the alignment down yet. Or the movement. So, I’m thinking, I taught myself crochet online – I could totally look these exercises up on youtube, right?
Excuse me, I’m going to pass out now. Maybe this will make more sense in the morning.